Okay, I will admit that we had a little accidental gunfire around here
recently, but nobody was hurt, and all that really happened is that I wasted a
lot of very expensive ammunition and scared the hell out of a lot of people,
including myself, a commotion which instantly activated my Amazing Mogambo
Reflexes (AMR), making me drop the delicious Hostess Cupcake that I was noisily
eating and take cover on the floor, falling, as I did, on top of the aforesaid
cupcake, smashing it all over myself, and all over the floor, which made it
taste terrible.
But the surprising gunfire was not my fault, as I had just read that the
Federal Reserve is being as dangerously incompetent as ever by continuing to
massively increase the money supply (which is so horrible because it causes
inflation in prices) so that they can buy up (monetize) at least a part of the
massive, monstrous, mega-moolah Treasury debt issuance that will be necessary
to
fund the unbelievable sum of, as I understand it, US$1.9 trillion in government
deficit-spending in the upcoming One Freaking Year (OFY) as a result of the
massive spending of the terrible, awful, worse-than-I-had-feared,
demon-from-hell Barack Obama administration, plus trillions more for the needs
of the private sector, and a trillion or so in congressional "supplemental
appropriations" throughout the year as congress periodically, almost ritually
in a satanic kind of way, "discovers" that their original estimate of their
borrowing needs was inadequate, and - surprise! - that these slimy, lying
bastards need LOTS and lots more money!
I can see by rereading that paragraph that I was so wrapped up in heaping
Massive Mogambo Scorn (MMS) on the arrogant, radical-left Obama, on every
sniveling Democrat in the place, most of the Republicans, and on the
despicable, guilty-as-charged, incompetent Federal Reserve that I never
actually got around to telling you how much money and credit the Fed created
last week, which was the original point I was going to make for some reason
other than decrying such irresponsible expansions of the money supply that will
guarantee horrific, economy-destroying, dollar-destroying, soul-destroying
inflation in prices, but I forgot what I was planning to say about it, to tell
you the truth, but with or without it, the increase in Fed credit last week was
another $5.2 billion, which (although terrifying), is less than his usual
increase, and at $5.2 billion, is merely twice the usual weekly rate of money
and credit creation by the monster Alan Greenspan, former chairman of the
Federal Reserve, who - single-handedly! - created all the economic mess of the
world by merely creating $10 billion-or-so per month of new Federal Reserve
money and credit!
Now, Fed chairman Ben Bernanke, a clueless academic, still stubbornly hews to
that same, tired, insipid-yet-stupid neo-Keynesian econometric theory that has
now been shown to be not only wrong, wrong, wrong, but also stupidly and
catastrophically wrong, which doesn't say anything at all about the morons,
like Bernanke and Princeton economist Alan Blinder, who are themselves mere
representative examples of the neo-Keynesian econometric bozos rampant in the
world today, all of whom believe in such imbecilities as their precious
economic theories in the face of, literally, overwhelming evidence to the
contrary! It is absurd on its face! Ya gotta laugh! Hahahaha!
Interestingly, a crucial part of the stupid Keynesian nonsense holds that the
government can, by virtue of borrowing the money, replace any perceived lost
"consumer demand", in any economic downturn, by merely borrowing and spending
money, even if borrowing and spending money was the cause of the original
downturn, and that there are no repercussions that cannot be solved by more
borrowing and spending, and that inflation in prices has nothing to do with the
money supply but with irrational exuberance! Which doesn't even make any sense!
Hahahah! It doesn't even freaking make sense!!
Sharp-eyed Junior Mogambo Rangers (JMRs) will recognize the two exclamation
points as indicators of something, usually the preceding sentence (as in this
case), as being very important, as, now that I notice, it is, in this case, in
that it is Beyond Freaking Crazy (BFC)!!!
Horrors! The punctuation using the rare triple exclamation point! You can tell
I am on a roll here! I suggest you go to someplace safe in your house where
your enemies would have to attempt a painful frontal assault against you, and
as you wait, you think to yourself, "Obviously, this is extremely important! As
indeed it is, now that I think about it after it has been drawn to my
attention, thanks to the Magnificent Mogambo (MM), because you do not get
anything except total, unmitigated disaster from inept management by people who
cannot be controlled and who are Beyond Freaking Crazy (BFC)!"
I am very proud of you for thinking this, as it shows that it has all become
clear: the preponderance of people on this planet, and in our universities, and
in our media, and in our governments, and in our central banks are BFC lunatics
if they think that borrowing (racking up debt) and spending money will "cure"
the bust of the boom produced by borrowing (racking up debt) and spending the
money! Hahahaha!
I immediately think of the joke, "Doctor! I've been gorging myself, but I never
lose any weight!" but it doesn't seem to fit the conversation, somehow, and it
doesn't really seem to have anything to do with anything I was talking about,
which makes me think that maybe my subconscious is telling me that I SHOULD
have been talking about it, which doesn't make any sense, either, because I
don't think anyone needs advice on how to gorge themselves, and in fact, people
seem quite disgusted when I do it, although it makes their kids laugh, meaning
that the kids like me better than they like their own parents, which is a small
victory for me and, although small, is a victory.
So I say to the kids, who just showed how much they love me, "Hey, kids! Tell
your parents that they are idiots unless they buy gold, silver and oil right
now, because unless they do, they are going to be poor when excessive
government deficit-spending and excessive Federal Reserve over-creation of
money and credit make prices soar as the buying power of the dollar falls,
which means that you will be poor, and you tell them how you don't want to be
poor, and how you have been thinking about, in an idle sort of economic
self-defense way, the many, many advantages of being too young to be charged
with a capital crime should they fail to acquire the aforesaid gold, silver and
oil!"
This is where the parents turned around and gave me this "dirty look", which I
interpreted to mean, "I surrender, under protest, to your magnificent, powerful
presentation of the case for gold, silver and oil, enhanced by the paranoid
notion that my own children are threatening to kill me in some bizarre
extortion racket involving gold, silver and oil that you have planted in my
head, which I realize is all for my own good because I now see that only an
idiot would not buy gold, silver and oil when the government and the banks are
acting so despicably! Thank you, handsome stranger!"
The name's Mogambo, ma'am. It's my job.
Richard Daughty is general partner and COO for Smith Consultant Group,
serving the financial and medical communities, and the editor of The Mogambo
Guru economic newsletter - an avocational exercise to heap disrespect on those
who desperately deserve it.
(Republished with permission from
The Daily Reckoning. Copyright 2010, The Daily Reckoning.)
Head
Office: Unit B, 16/F, Li Dong Building, No. 9 Li Yuen Street East,
Central, Hong Kong Thailand Bureau:
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