"Here Is An Article For Your Favorite Mining CEO" is the title of an essay by
Peter Degraaf writing at FinancialSense.com, spreading the word of Bill Murphy
and GATA.org exposing the slimy manipulation of gold by central banks and the
International Monetary Fund, which is surprising to us full-time idiots and/or
part-time parents, as everyone else already knows that the Federal Reserve and
the IMF are - as are all governments and other central banks - full of liars,
thieves and morons, who, in this case, "treat gold that had been leased to
bullion banks and sold into the market as if it were still in the vault!"
He says, "Imagine if an entrepreneur was running his business in this
underhanded manner - how long would the government allow that?"
Well, I don't know about entrepreneurs, but I do know about
scared and desperate worthless little weasels like me! And as the unofficial
spokesman for all the scared and desperate worthless little weasels of the
world who don't want to get what we deserve, I say - this gives me a great idea
for a problem I have at work!
From now on, I will similarly treat anything either sent to me, or returned by
an angry customer demanding his money back, as still being in the possession of
the disgruntled client/customer! Thus, they never sent me anything, see? It's
brilliant!
And if they say that they did send me something, then they are lying because,
thanks to my simply declaring it all to be somewhere else, it obviously can't
also be here, a paradox already disproved by the Firesign Theatre, who famously
said, "How can you be in two places at once when you're not anywhere at all?"
And this "you never sent me anything" goes double-ditto for any snotty letters
to me or my boss disparaging my intelligence ("irritating drooling halfwit"),
my work performance ("shocking incompetence"), and/or my grasp of social
conventions ("lying, filthy little bastard").
Now, thanks to this wonderful new ability to simply declare Where Things Are
(WTA), everything is now magically "back" with the hateful little people who
sent me all that stuff to start with! Hahahaha! This WTA is great stuff!
With a smile of self-satisfaction in having handled that so well, I now have
Marlene working the shredders, full time, because if letters and incriminating
evidence are still back with the customer, then they cannot be here, and by
God, they soon won't be as long as those shredders, and Marlene, hold out!
Hahaha!
But this sleight of hand will not forever solve the government's dilemma about
gold, and one day there will be some excess of people who want their physical
gold bullion and who are trying to cash in the Comex futures contracts, and the
gold will not be there. What is gold worth, then?
To ponder this, I had locked myself safely inside the Mogambo Ironsides Bunker
(MIB) and I was telling my family via intercom that we are freaking doomed, and
there is nothing but despair and misery ahead of us now that the Federal
Reserve has destroyed the economy by creating the excessive amounts of money
and credit that allowed bubbles in the sizes of government (which are the
biggest in history), the prices of stocks, the prices of bonds and the prices
of houses and the destruction of the dollar's buying power.
I explained to them that my logic is simple; that I would rather be in here,
alone, without my family around to remind me of how they ruined my life!
After a brisk conversation about who actually ruined who's life, the point they
were trying to make was not their usual whining about how I am a terrible
father and husband (which is the point that they always try to make), but that
there is always opportunity in crisis! "Come out and get some opportunity!"
they chimed cheerily!
At this, I am thinking to myself, "Yeah, I know! I know there is opportunity,
just like I know you ruined my life! That is why I am buying gold, silver and
oil at these ridiculously low prices, so that when they soar, thanks to the
roaring inflation that will be caused by the Federal Reserve creating so much
money and credit so that the Congress can spend so much money, that I will be
rich, rich, rich! Then I can afford to send you all to places that are far, far
away from me so that I don't see you, smell you, or hear your disparaging
remarks all the time ('You're weird, dad!'), where I can walk around in my
underwear anytime I want and there won't be anyone here to say things like,
'Oh, dad! Gross! For crying out loud, put some pants on! I think my
girlfriend's mother is going to puke!' and my wife won't be saying, 'Yeah,
gross! I have to see him all the time like that when you kids aren't here! And
worse!' and the kids all went 'Ewwwww!'"
So, curious about why in the hell they would be talking about "opportunities",
I looked out of the periscope of the bunker and I noticed that they had a piece
of paper that they were trying to show me, which turned out to be by John
Rubino of dollarcollapse.com, writing, "focusing solely on the bad news ignores
the other side of the coin: Problems create opportunities, and big, complex
problems create vast opportunities."
Well, I figure that now that the Fed has promised to create unlimited amounts
of money and credit - which will come in real handy since the Congress is full
of people who want to "do something" by spending lots of money - the White
House will be full of people that want to "do something" by spending lots of
money; and the world is full of people wanting governments to "do something" by
spending lots of money. The only question is: where to spend all of that money
that is politically popular and eco-friendly?
Mr Rubino sees immediately where I am heading with this, and instead of
congratulating me on my keen, incisive intellect in ferreting out the nub of
the problem, he instead seems to imply that I am, as usual, late to the party,
which he wordlessly seems to prove by displaying his book titled Green Money
with the subhead Picking Winners in the Green Tech Boom.
I admit that I have not read it, not only because I am stupid, but also because
I have a short attention span, the comprehension skills of a mental defective
and zero retention, rendering me unable to read books that have more than a few
pages, and which are mostly pictures of choo-choo trains or kittens.
And anyway, reading makes my eyes hurt because would also have to try to be
looking up and down, up and down, focusing and re-focusing to keep an eye on
the wife and kids, all of them "making dinner" in the kitchen and acting pretty
damned suspiciously, just to make sure they are not putting something in my
food.
And while he is certainly on to something, now that unlimited amounts of money
are being promised to be spent, I remain a gold, silver and oil kind of guy
because, as the quintessential stupid guy, I need something brainless. And
there is nothing more brainless than gold, silver and oil when the Federal
Reserve is being allowed to act like this!
Whee! This investing stuff is easy!
Richard Daughty is general partner and COO for Smith Consultant Group,
serving the financial and medical communities, and the editor of The Mogambo
Guru economic newsletter - an avocational exercise to heap disrespect on those
who desperately deserve it.
(Republished with permission from
The Daily Reckoning. Copyright 2009, The Daily Reckoning.)
Head
Office: Unit B, 16/F, Li Dong Building, No. 9 Li Yuen Street East,
Central, Hong Kong Thailand Bureau:
11/13 Petchkasem Road, Hua Hin, Prachuab Kirikhan, Thailand 77110
